Tuesday, July 26

Our Story, Part Three: My life was really hard but the Hubster was an awesome boyfriend, and then he proposed and I was really happy. Gaaag.

But first, might I offer you a small platter of Part One (first "date")?
Or perhaps a generous helping of Part Two (Hubster's side of the story)?

Alright amigos, I'm not going to lie. There's not too much to say about our first few years together without sounding completely cliché. I was finishing high school, Jason was starting college, and we were pathetically in love. The summers were magic; the school years were a steady routine: classes, then sports practice, then hang-out-with-Jason-and-somehow-manage-to-complete-homework, then walk-Jason-out-to-his-car-at-night-"to-say-goodbye"-AKA-end-up-telling-each-other-our-life-stories/making-out-in-his-car-until-1AM. Nearly every night my mom would walk out to the porch, flick the light on & off, and ring the windchime like a cowbell to remind me of my curfew. Poor, poor Mom... it was bad.
16 & 17 years old... totally mature enough to pick our future life partners, yes?
But as for my first years in college, away from home? They should have been the worst time in my life. They should have been absolute, effing HELL-- I was missing my baby sister & family, I was averaging 5-hours'-sleep-a-night  in Architecture School (battling unbearable workloads designed to "weed out" the undevoted), and I was terrified and heartbroken to know that my parents were suddenly on the brink of a divorce.

Couldn't have done it without you, buddy.
Yet instead, those first years away from home were some of the best I've ever lived. Jason was my rock. He listened when I needed comfort, and cracked me up when I needed distraction. He held me tight while I literally curled into a ball of stress in his lap, bawling my eyes out until 2AM. If I stayed at school all night, he'd drive to campus at sunrise with a home-cooked omelette.

Looking back, I can't believe how selfless he was for me during that period. (Yes, he had classes of his own as well.) Everyone in Architorture school neglected their relationships in place of schoolwork, myself included, and I watched couples break up all around me. But Jason was a champ-- instead of complaining abut how busy I was, he cheered me on.

I adored him like a little girl crushes on a classmate; I loved him like the long-term boyfriend he was, but there was a feeling beyond that, that continued to grow bigger by the time I went to bed every night. The feeling was familiar, yet I couldn't put my finger on it. I would introduce him to my friends as my "boyfriend," but the word felt so empty compared to how much he meant to me. Finally, I realized: I loved him in the same way I loved the rest of my family. A comforting, stable love that would still be there, no matter what he did or didn't do for me. When I was with him, it felt like "home."

And yet, true to my stubborn ways, I didn't want to get married quite so young. I wanted to rebel against the cutesy Disney timeline where the 'princesses' practically move straight from their parents' house to their new husband's. And deep down, I'll be honest-- I didn't want people to judge me for getting married in my early twenties. I didn't want them to judge me as naive. I didn't think it was "cool."

On a long roadtrip home from a friend's wedding, we had "the talk." I told him that in few years, he might start thinking about proposing. But as soon as the words were out of my mouth, I regretted it-- I realized I didn't want him to wait. He kept on being amazing, I kept falling for him, and for the rest of the summer, I kept hoping he'd read my mind and surprise me. I even toyed with the idea of asking him myself. (I should have just told him all this, but remember what I said about being stubborn?)

A few months after "the talk", four years after our first date, we found ourselves 10,000 feet in the sky, perched atop the pointy peak of a mountain. It's one of our favorite places in the world-- we climb it every year when we help coach a high school cross country camp.
 
(Yes, you know where this is going.) (And yes, this means we were surrounded by dozens of squealing high-schoolers when he proposed to me. They freaking LOVED it. They had our wedding all planned out by the time we'd climbed back down the mountain.)

MT. McLOVIN'!! (So classic that I'm wearing a hoodie and holding a Gatorade bottle.)

I didn't hear the squeals, though; honestly, for me this moment with Jason on his knees in front of me was like a cheesy, slow-mo movie scene. Running through the waves Bounding through the flowery fields Looking into his teared-up blue eyes, I tried to capture the image in my mind forever. I finally remembered to choke out a "YES" through my giddy grin.

The hubster did well in picking out his proposal spot. You can see its snowy peak miles away in our hometown, and I smile every time I look at it.

(Next installmentt: Wedding video!! If you haven't keeled over from all the moosh yet, say your prayers.)

14 comments:

Nanoinfinity said...

There is no "D'AWWWWWWWWWWWWW" big enough. :3

"I would introduce him to my friends as my "boyfriend," but the word felt so empty compared to how much he meant to me."

I know the feeling. Boyfriend feels far too casual. I mean, everyone has boyfriends, but mine is special. But there isn't a word that's... powerful enough.

I actually really like the term fiancee, and I hate husband so maybe I should just stay engaged forever. (We're effectively engaged, just no official ring or anything :P )

"And deep down, I'll be honest-- I didn't want people to judge me for getting married in my early twenties. I didn't want them to judge me as naive."

This, too. I get a little alarmed to see all the people I went to high school getting married and having kids - when they're my age, 21 and 22. Marriage is a thing grown-ups do, and I don't feel like a grown-up yet!

Caitlin said...

I hated the word Boyfriend! Wanted to say soulmate instead but that sounds weird. I felt the same way about getting married in our early 20s too...you guys remind me a lot of us! So adorable, thank you for sharing your story.

Laura said...

I love reading other people's love stories! I also was nervous about the judging about getting married young but then decided, whatever! I know me, and I know him and this is what we want to do.

Laura

Foxygen said...

Even as a cynical 30-something, this made me smile. You're good people.

Sam said...

I am so glad you guys found each other. I think everyone deserves to have that person in their life who they feel "at home" with all the time, whether that person is a friend or lover or family member or what have you. God bless you kids and your love! <3

Jacqueline H. Vo said...

i'm not a big fan of the term "boyfriend" either... it feels distanced. but you're right, there's not a word that's more powerful enough, yet, not as serious and beautiful sounding like fiance... ahhh. i sometimes call my beau "manfriend" but that also sounds distanced.

Wallie said...

What a wonderful tribute to your husband! Brought tears to my eyes!!! The fantastic feeling knowing that he loves you just as much (if not more) as you love him. :) To our wonderful husbands who stick with us, no matter what!!

Emma @ She Got Married said...

"I would introduce him to my friends as my "boyfriend," but the word felt so empty compared to how much he meant to me. Finally, I realized: I loved him in the same way I loved the rest of my family. A comforting, stable love that would still be there, no matter what he did or didn't do for me. When I was with him, it felt like "home." "

Yes. Beautifully said. Where our story differs a bit in the minor details, this was how it went down. I love good husbands.

April said...

I'm so happy to hear that so many of you have awesome guys that you feel the same way about!

And for you two 'cynics'/non-mooshers, I'm flattered I could find a soft spot in there somewhere : )

Cat said...

Awww ... that is hilarious about your mom ... aka: the curfew police :)

Love that you captured the proposal moment on film ... awesome!

♥ Cat brideblu

Miss Tattoo said...

This made me smile. I don't like the word "boyfriend" either. It sounds so...high school. I don't know. When I use to introduce him to people as my future husband.

Yvonne said...

This is SO sweet. Love it :)

Sammie said...

The biggest smile I've ever seen on my brothers face was on your wedding day. The second biggest I can remember vividly is the day we went to get your ring : ) Im glad to read this story and know you've found home in each other. Love you big sheesta

April said...

Awww Sammie that's awesome!! His smile is my favorite thing I've ever seen : ) Love you too!