Thursday, December 30
It was a different day than I'm used to. But it was a good day, and the two hours were totally worth it.
It's strange to watch your parents heal from heartbreak. I've always been the "fixer" in our family, but I've learned over the past few years that this one is something I shouldn't--something I really can't-- fix. Letting go of this has been a roller coaster.
Most of the time, I feel relief. Occasionally, I've felt like an angsty teenager who wants to blast heavy metal (I do) and drive her car too fast (I don't). My little sister has been a role model for me; she rolls with the changes like a champ. Jason has also been amazing, as usual. He listens when I need to mourn, and cracks me up when I need to be happy.
In the past two weeks, I've made a lot of progress wrapping my head around my parents' separation. You might have noticed that it hasn't been too good for writing here-- when most of my thoughts had been occupied with other people's personal lives, I was kind of stuck not writing anything at all.
So why post this at all? It isn't a plea for pity; it isn't really even an apology for not writing much lately. I want to be honest and real with you guys. It feels wrong to only talk about the happy stuff.
So. I've been going through a bit of a tough time lately, but it's getting better.