Tuesday, November 9

Sveedish Sveets!!

On Halloween night, we went to Veely's and stockpiled a bulk-candy smörgåsbord (yes, from now on I'm going to be a snob about spelling that word with all its vowel decorations).

First of all, we didn't find any Swedish Fish. HowEVER-- we did find Swedish Dolphins. They're as if a crunchy cereal marshmallow, a s'more marshmallow, and tutti frutti gum had porpoise babies.

Jason: How much time does that pizza have in the oven?
April: About 15 more minutes.
Jason: Okay. I'm gonna have a dolphin.

Other candies of note:
The black & red soda bottles : They're covered in fizzy stuff! Very exciting. (I tried to make them say "cheers!" but it looks like one had been drinking something other than soda...)

That long chocolate thing on the bottom right corner: turned out to be a fake-banana-flavored marshmallow dipped in chocolate. One of the grossest things I've ever tried to eat.

Top & center (light brown/gray): Strangely licorice-flavored hard candy. When you bite into it, there's salt in the middle. I like salt. This is pretty cool.

Bottom left owl-mask things: Also salty licorice. However, this is some sort of mineral salt that tastes like... how a match smells when it first ignites. Sulphur, maybe? It also makes your tongue tingle like cuuhRAZY. I freaked out after the first bite I took (jumped straight off the couch and made a-fish-biting-a-lemon face, then shook my head frantically like that one time my dog ate a bumblebee, then stifled a gag).*

...but now I'm strangely addicted to nibbling on them. (Suffices to say: I can't convince Jason to try them.)

Thanks a lot, Sweden. You've gotten me addicted to sulphur-salt licorice. Awkward.

Glory be to Veely's, I've since discovered a "Nicorette" for this ailment:

Now you can enjoy all the freakish flavor without getting sticky black stuff stuck in your teeth and scaring the Sveeds and turning your toothbrush gray!

(Sulphur breath still an issue.)

*This reaction may also be partially explained by the fact that I rarely eat sugar and was pretttty on-edge at the time.**
**Which may also explain why my dad hid my Halloween candy when I was little, and rationed out one piece per day until it was "all gone" two weeks later.

(Leave a comment if you're curious about any other candies in the picture. We might even send you some.)


Kristie said...

The chocolate/fake banana thing looks like a turd.

April said...

Seriously. It might as well have been. Although the other turdy-looking things were awesome; they were basically Cheetos with chocolate instead of cheese : )

Mom Matthews said...

It looks like you could make a great board game out of this - "Name That Candy!" Hours of fun with family and friends! Sound like there should also be a warning - "Playing pieces may or may not be edible." or "Play at your own risk!"

Samantha said...

I would love to try the banana turd!

April said...

Good, because I'm shipping you some. I totally, totally thought of you when I tried it.

Mandy said...

Has anyone made a licorette joke yet? If not, dibs.